(Feb 26, 2019)
I have now been in rehab for a week and have been making nice gains. After a week, my medical review took place. They decided to extend my stay one more week. I guess having a seizure in the pool didn’t help my case. I continued talking to the neuropsychologist every few days, which I did find helpful and she was very easy to talk to. I’m still struggling with the tremors during PT and OT. I’m now able to use a walker when walking which is very exciting. My walking distance even kept improving. However, the first time they gave it to me and I started walking I almost tipped it over due to tremors. The tremors lifted the walker right off of the ground. They decided to put ankle weights around the sides of it to weigh it down and that made a huge difference.
Spouse day was at the end of the week right before discharge. That's to show the spouse how I maneuver on the toilet, shower chair, walking, stairs, and how I move around the kitchen. The OT even wanted me to make a sandwich during his time with us. My task was to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I had to move around the kitchen using the walker with no assistance and use the tools she taught me which was to use a basket or gather the items and slide them on the counter to the other end little at a time. I was ready to show him what I learned. I started off strong, getting the bread and jelly from the fridge and placing it on the counter. I then slid it down as I was planning to then move down the counter to get a plate, knife and the peanut butter. Tremors started! Now if I was smart, I should’ve sat for a few minutes and then finished the task but, I so wanted to complete the task in one go…..so I continued on. I walked over to the cabinet and took out the peanut butter and shut/open, shut/open went the door (due to tremors) but finally it stayed opened and I grabbed the peanut butter. I grabbed a plate and a knife from the drying rack. I needed help opening up the jars, but I spread the jelly and peanut butter the best I could while my body was having it’s own rock concert. I also insisted on cutting it in half to end it. I did it! It didn’t look pretty, I wouldn’t eat it, but I made it! My therapist said that when home and If I’m helping, I need a chair behind me and I MUST sit down as soon as the tremors start. None of this finishing the task because the tremors will just get worse and more intense. I’m so stubborn, but I wanted to show my husband I could do it, but I understand what she meant.
One thing I won’t miss here are the lonely moments. The times of no therapy, having no visitors got pretty sad and lonely. I was one of the youngest people in this faculty, there were only about 5 of us. I can’t imagine how it is for the elderly patients here. We all need social interaction of some sort. On weekends, the majority of us don’t have therapy and the social committee would set up some activities for us to do that are optional that took place two times a day. I would always make a point to do it, because it got me out of the room. If my kids came during game time, they would come too. I remember one time, they came for bowling and the other patients loved seeing the young kids. They brought a smile to their faces. It was always the same group of people doing the activities. There was this one guy that would always fall asleep during the game. I sat next to him during BINGO once and I was trying to help him play, but my goal was to keep him awake. I was like “ Sir, You have it, you have to mark it”. He was a riot. I just tried to make people laugh and make the best of a sucky situation. But, when the game was over we all returned back to our quiet room all alone.
Today is the day that I’m breaking out of here and onto my next stage of recovery. I will get OT and PT at home for a bit and then I will get outpatient PT at Kessler since I’m familiar with this facility. I haven’t been home in a little over 3 weeks now. Tomorrow is my son's birthday, and what a gift that will be for him. Oh, how I miss my old life and how things used to be. Will things ever be the same again I keep wondering. How I see myself at this stage, I see a long slow recovery for me. But I am strong, I am fierce! Even in my moments of weakness my strength is still within and will shine through at some point.
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